Wonderlust Imaginings and Other Such Rainbows

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Thu, 27 Dec 2012 11:18:16 -0500

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Thu, 27 Dec 2012 11:15:07 -0500

#lover #best friend #superman #snuggle #lonely #far away

Wed, 26 Dec 2012 19:54:04 -0500

#lover #best friend #superman #snuggle #lonely #far away

Engagement toast

Sun, 15 Apr 2012 18:12:00 -0400

You have been a huge part of my life for the past four years. First as my friend, then my boyfriend and now my Fiancé. We have come a long way, but I place the blame on you. Because of you I hate sleeping alone, my mornings are a little worse if I don’t get to stroke your beard and I don’t want to dance with anyone else. I know we’re young, but I know what I want and I won’t settle for anyone else but you. You complete me. You give me strength when I feel like I can’t go on and I can’t help but smile around you. Cormac my dear, it’s only once that you meet the love of your life. I met mine in matrices and vectors. I want to tell you that I love you in such a way that there’s no doubt in your mind or anyone elses. You are the one for me. You are a kind, intelligent man, you stand up for what you believe is right and your principles are very important to you. I have a lot of respect for that. You are also a caring, compassionate person. You took a puppy home in your jacket and she is one of the happiest dogs I’ve ever met. You look after me. You care about people and while not everyone can see it, I know you do. Not to mention you are gorgeous. Cormac, I am honoured and privileged to have you in my ife. I honestly don’t know what you see in me. I am so lucky to have found you and I can’t get over the fact that you agreed to marry me. Not only am I enjoying the here and now, but I love forward to our future with excitement and anticipation. I love you with all my heart.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3a7cHPy04s8

Sun, 25 Mar 2012 05:44:24 -0400

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3a7cHPy04s8:

This song seems oddly appropriate right now, even though I’m the opposite of what the song is saying right now.

25th of March 2012

Sun, 25 Mar 2012 05:35:35 -0400

Dear diary,

Today my head hurts and my stomach is rebelling against all my best intentions. It’s my birthday today and I went out last night, Cormac, Orla, Mies, Clancy and Eoin. I drank a little and got to the hyper stage of drunk very quickly.

We danced, I got a pretty French girl to dance with Eoin, who is painfully shy around women. Orla and Clancy proved yet again how fucking cute they are and Mies was girly with me on all the Rhianna, Lady Gaga etc. Cormac never left my side. He danced with me so much he fell asleep on the bus.

I feel satisfied today,content, full, sated, whatever word fits best, I’m not quite sure. This is one of those days where I feel completely loved. It’s a great feeling and everyone should get to experience it once in their lives. We didn’t have sex last night, we didn’t even sleep in the same bed, but having him in the same room while I slept meant the world to me.

Today is a good day. I hope I remember it.

Warts && All: Adventures of Dr. Kathastrophe #1

Sat, 24 Mar 2012 10:38:56 -0400

Warts && All: Adventures of Dr. Kathastrophe #1:

doctor-kathastrophe:

On Tuesday, my friend Niamh and I went to this natural soap products place and they had these things call portable toothpaste pellets, so I tried one. Little did I know it composed mostly of baking soda. I just started frothing at the mouth. I mean seriously, thick, white bubbly froth…

I love it when a certain someone’s hand just rests on my...

Sat, 24 Mar 2012 09:45:10 -0400

I love it when a certain someone’s hand just rests on my sternum, with no intention of moving it anywhere else.

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Sat, 24 Mar 2012 07:02:45 -0400

24th of March 2012

Sat, 24 Mar 2012 06:38:41 -0400

Dear diary,

Today I am in college, feeling like slicing into my wrists quite cleanly and precisely. I am studying for my thesis but I can’t focus. I have the potential to go places in my field, but I’m held back by thoughts of nothingness and feeling blank.

Walking up the steps, even though the cherry trees are in full blossom and the leaf buds are ready to explode, all I could picture, was me walking up those steps, in my long navy coat with blood dripping down my sleeves. Dark red droplets contrasting with the concrete pavings, just walking on further with all the people around me not even noticing.

It’s a beautiful day here. I’m going out for my birthday later, but right now, all I want to do, is hide under my desk in the fetal position and not think for a little while longer, then everything will be ok.

I feel crazy. I should be so fucking happy right now, I’m very much in love, I’m finishing my degree and I have friends around me. I can’t explain to myself why I feel like this. It’s not rational, but then there’s a time and a place for everything and maybe right now isn’t the time for being rational. Who really knows this stuff anyway?

I’m not going to do anything stupid, my life is too important to me, I have so much going for me right now. I’m just having a low day.

If tomorrow’s not better, the day after will be. I have a lot of love still to give.

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Wed, 21 Mar 2012 16:19:29 -0400

Cunninlingus

Mon, 19 Mar 2012 18:58:11 -0400

I just had the best sex of my life ever, and apparently, I look like I’m stoned off my bean.

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Fri, 16 Mar 2012 08:49:05 -0400

Missing you

Tue, 06 Mar 2012 07:38:00 -0500

I try not to miss you, because I’ll see you soon,

But even in your presence I know I’ll miss you soon.

I’ll see you on Friday all day and all night,

I can never get quite close enough to your light.

You make me wonder and cause me to think a lot

And I wonder what is the meaning of this plot.

Should we be together?

I think so my friend, My love for you will never end,

I’ll miss you till then.

WHAT IS YOUR EARLIEST HUMAN MEMORY?

Mon, 05 Mar 2012 16:19:34 -0500

Watching my family swimming at the pool and not being old enough to go in.

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Sat, 03 Mar 2012 18:36:05 -0500

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Tue, 28 Feb 2012 12:48:00 -0500

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Tue, 28 Feb 2012 12:47:12 -0500

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Tue, 28 Feb 2012 12:36:05 -0500

I’m sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. I just want things to go my way for once without...

Tue, 28 Feb 2012 12:19:33 -0500

I’m sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. I just want things to go my way for once without everything seeming so damn hard. I miss Cormac and I’m disappointed he couldn’t meet me. It wasn’t his fault, just circumstances got in the way. I wish I could catch up with my college work, I’ve fallen really far behind. I wish my parents would accept who I really am. I wish people didn’t give negative advice when I need some positivity in my life.

I’m tired, and I wanna go home, but I have a class for the next two hours and I’m already dreading turning my phone back on afterwards.